Where did I go?

I used to be a girl with goals and ambition.  I had hunger for accomplishment and didn't let things trip me up. Big things could get me down, but I'd come back up fighting.  I wasn't afraid, I was sure of what I wanted and everyone else could go jump themselves.  That was my attitutued if you didn't like me feel free to screw yourself, cuz I don't give a damn.  I was full of anger at the world in general.  I thought people can't do anything right or good, just look at history hell just look at the news happening here and now.  I'd be intrested to see what people picture of this person I've forgotten about until recently.

Now fear rules me.  I won't try new things because I might get hurt.  I won't go to some places because something might happen.  Hell I haven't gotten a haircut because I might look worse than I do now. Do you get where this is going?  I've forgetten about goals or ambition and therefore I haven't done anything major in my life in the last few years.  Life is simple at the moment work, spend money on who knows what I have none and nothing to show for it, clean, eat, and when possible spend time with friends and family.  It's been this routine for the better part of the last couple of years.  It will continue to be the same routine if I stay the way I am.  The reason being that I fear something might happen if I change this routine.  What could happen if I change things up?

If I try to be financially independent, I might find out that I'm not acutally able to do so like I thought I could. 
If I try to be independent I might find out that I don't know much and start crying because life is about to hit me a curve ball.
If I try to be independent I might find out that I am lonely and change my mind about needing my own family.

I think all that instead of being positive and thinking I'll have my own place that I can do anything I want with,  I can be independent.  So I might not know everything, but I can handle it.  That family I don't have you know what I don't need it, but I still want it sometime down the line.  So for the moment this is who've I've become someone who fears what might happen.